Monday, April 28, 2008
i wanted to blog so much about my life despite it being no-life.
sometimes i wonder whether all the sacrifices i made was worth it.
why do i feel that people are just waiting for me to fail so that they can surpass me?
to some, i am supposed to be a very smart person(which i don't think i am anyway.)and As are supposed to come to me naturally.
reason being, i am in E1.
and, it doesn't help that my bro is the top N level and O level student of his batch with cousins in ACSI, cedar girls, RGS, VJC.
my grandma, dad's mom, passed away ytd cos of sudden low blood sugar.
after receiving the news, i realise that i cannot continue to do my maths(which i was doing at that time).
i didn't know what to say to my dad who was telling me the news.
then i managed a "huh?!"
dad's over at grandma's house now.
and i just realised... that the last time i saw her... was chinese new year. 2, close to 3 months ago.
i wasn't very close to her, yet we always bothered to bring niunai to her house cause she likes playing with him.
dad said this to niunai ytd: "now greatgrandma cannot see you already. no, she can. she'll see you from heaven." and then planted a kiss on niunai's forehead.
i don't know how much niunai understands but now, he is staring at the living room window, waiting for dad to come back.
*i don't know how to continue this post. shall end it here. chem pp tml*
sometimes i wonder whether all the sacrifices i made was worth it.
why do i feel that people are just waiting for me to fail so that they can surpass me?
to some, i am supposed to be a very smart person(which i don't think i am anyway.)and As are supposed to come to me naturally.
reason being, i am in E1.
and, it doesn't help that my bro is the top N level and O level student of his batch with cousins in ACSI, cedar girls, RGS, VJC.
my grandma, dad's mom, passed away ytd cos of sudden low blood sugar.
after receiving the news, i realise that i cannot continue to do my maths(which i was doing at that time).
i didn't know what to say to my dad who was telling me the news.
then i managed a "huh?!"
dad's over at grandma's house now.
and i just realised... that the last time i saw her... was chinese new year. 2, close to 3 months ago.
i wasn't very close to her, yet we always bothered to bring niunai to her house cause she likes playing with him.
dad said this to niunai ytd: "now greatgrandma cannot see you already. no, she can. she'll see you from heaven." and then planted a kiss on niunai's forehead.
i don't know how much niunai understands but now, he is staring at the living room window, waiting for dad to come back.
*i don't know how to continue this post. shall end it here. chem pp tml*
what we could have been, 7:06 PM.
